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By Bluey Crackersport, on May 11th, 2009 A Happy Marriage – Aus Style
Four women interviewed by Four Corners allege they have been involved in group sex with players or been victims of sexual abuse. Details of one group sex session, involving Nine Network star Matthew Johns when he was playing with NRL club Cronulla in 2002, were revealed last
Continue reading Ausfailure’s Love Of Group Sex Under Attack
By Bluey Crackersport, on December 28th, 2008 Updated 28-12-2008 19:00
Only Ausfailure could offer a $1000 dollar Rugby League 2008 World Cup winning souvenir to fans of a team that hadn’t won the game yet.
This ad was placed in the Daily Telegraph inviting Aussies to celebrate their win before the game.
No, really
We have fixed the typos
Continue reading If you thought Anthony Mundine was a big headed twat, take a look at this
By Bluey Crackersport, on November 28th, 2008 One word: Monahan.
If you can’t win it fair, then cheat.
Monahan’s professional foul on Hohaia summed up 50 years of professional cheating by a team that claims (falsely) to be the best in the world.
With the Kangalose on the rack and the Kiwi’s rampaging through them at will Monahan played the man instead
Continue reading Kiwi’s Retain World Champion Status
By Bluey Crackersport, on August 16th, 2008 Updated 16-08-2008 17:45
Aussie men are well known for going out on the turps and chundering their guts up after a couple of shandy’s but rarely do they perform this feat on the world stage.
Today in Beijing ocker boofhead Jared Tallent changed all that by upchucking his guts after losing the men’s 20km
Continue reading Down-Under Losers Blunder and Chunder
By Bluey Crackersport, on July 2nd, 2008 Updated 02-07-2008 14:30
While it is a generally accepted fact that Aussie sports people are the worlds biggest cheats due to their inability to compete effectively on a level playing field a study just released proves that they are not the only ones cheating to get by in the big league.
Sports referees from
Continue reading Official: Aussie Refs Admit To Being Cheats Too
By Bluey Crackersport, on July 2nd, 2008 When Rugby League role model and celebrated national hero Andrew Johns boasted about taking banned drugs for a decade without punishment a year ago he obviously he sent a message to other athletes from Ausfailure not quite good enough to compete without cheating. That message was ‘take any drugs you like, you’ll probably get away
Continue reading Ausfailure Drug Cheat Numbers Swell For Olympic Glory
By Bluey Crackersport, on June 30th, 2008 Pineapple House
Rugby League fans from Ausfailure yesterday mourned the achievement of New Zealander Reuben Wiki in becoming the first New Zealander to play 300 first grade games in the NR-Hell.
Kiwis have always struggled to make 300 games because of the way they are shafted by the corrupt jokediciary which uses a
Continue reading Wiki Beats The Odds
By Bluey Crackersport, on June 26th, 2008 International Soccer ringmasters Fifa have laughed off the tuggery of the Football Federation of Ausfailure after they tried to impose an on again off again ban on one of their thugs for smacking over a ref. Originally suspended from competing at the August 8-24 Games after being handed a 15-month suspension for striking referee Mark
Continue reading FIFA says F-OFF FFS to FFA
By Bluey Crackersport, on October 16th, 2007 New Zealand Rugby League bosses have sought the advice of their counterparts from Ausfailure as the World Champion Rugby League team came to terms with the embarrassing loss to easybeats the Kangalose in an exhibition match played to promote the game in Wellington on the weekend.
Formerly known as the ANZAC Test the friendly match
Continue reading Ausfailure Offers Advice On Losing For Kiwis
By Bluey Crackersport, on October 30th, 2005 In news just to hand Ausfailure has won something. Sports journalists the world over were rocked when Ausfailure’s International Rules team triumphed over Ireland.
Ausfailure wrapped up the series on Friday with a 21-point win.
“We desperately needed to win this match” said an ecstatic Ocker as he shed tears of pride over the long
Continue reading World Shocked At Ocker Win
By Bluey Crackersport, on October 24th, 2005 Skull of an Aussie
World champion moaners Ausfailure were today awarded the Gold Medal in Whinging following a poll by legendary sports announcers.
The Medal is the highest honor for whingers and until recently is was seen that England owned the rights to this annual award, but Ausfailure has creamed all the opposition
Continue reading Ausfailure Lowers Bar on Whinging
By Bluey Crackersport, on October 21st, 2005 Following Saturdays horrific loss to the lowly ranked Kiwi rugby league team Australian sports officials are crying foul over the state of the playing field at Albany stadium. Albany is the scene of relentless hammerings to Aussie sports teams at the hands of random New Zealand squads and according to sources close to the losing
Continue reading Aussies Cry Foul Over Albany Arena
By Bluey Crackersport, on October 16th, 2005 Australians were to day reeling from yet another humiliation on the sports field as their alleged world champion rugby league team succumbed to a 4th string Kiwi team in Sydney on Saturday night.
The Kiwis chances were weakened as usual by various skulduggery by the fear fueled Australian tryhards but as usual this did not
Continue reading Australia or Ausfailure?
By Bluey Crackersport, on October 11th, 2005 New Zealand today was allowed to announce it’s rugby league team to play Australia in the upcoming Tri-Nations series.
The team is: Brent Webb, Jake Webster, Paul Whatuira, Clinton Toopi, Manu Vatuvei, Nigel Vagana, Stacey Jones, Paul Rauhihi, Lance Hohaia, Ruben Wiki, David Kidwell, Frank Pritchard and Louis Anderson.
On the bench are David Faiumu,
Continue reading Kiwis Announce 4th String Team To Play Australia
By Bluey Crackersport, on October 5th, 2005 Australian Captain Ms Darren Lockyer shows off the new test strip for the paparazzi.
The head honchos of Australian Rugby League today announced that for all test matches against formidable third string Kiwi rugby league sides Australian Players would be kitted out in a special playing strip. A spokesman said that the new
Continue reading Australia Announces New Test Strip
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