What to do with Wee Willy and his Peers
With so many famous Aussies being snapped whipping out their little willys and taking a leak any old place the question needs to be ask as the whether or not Ausfailure is in fact a dunny.
Wee Willy Mason got his hands wet whilst standing to pee in May of this year and recently current Kangalose forward Paul Gallen was charged with urinating in public during last Friday’s weekly NSW police blitz, which resulted in 516 charges being laid against 333 people across NSW on Friday night.
When you consider the now infamous use of a sh!thouse by 3 Broncoes players to have group sex with each other it could be argued that the only reason an Aussie rugby league player enters a dunny is to dip his wick in a fellow players spent jism.
So where does one go to the toilet?
Obviously these guys are finding it hard to distinguish Ausfailure from a crapper, and who can blame them?
“Not me” said Lionel Urinal, a fan from Bummee NSW. “When me and the missus go to the footy and fill ourselves up with beer we don’t even leave our seats to take a leak, we just go” he dribbled.
Senior Sanitation Supervisor for Stadium Ausfailure Oswald P Wrong had no issues with people using the stadium proper as a toilet.
“On the upside people taking a leak or doing a dump out in the open is that it tends to improve the smell of our nation” Oswald said.
Ausfailure first came to international attention for matters like this when the documentary film ‘The Adventures Of Barry McKenzie” was released in 1972 detailing the cultural habits of Aussies. A famous part of the documentary is where McKenzie needs to use the toilet and says “Now listen mate, I need to splash the boots. You know, strain the potatoes. Water the horses. You know, go where the big knobs hang out. Shake hands with the wife’s best friend? Drain the dragon? Siphon the python? Ring the rattlesnake? You know, unbutton the mutton? Like, point Percy at the porcelain?”
