Latest Aussie Whinge ‘Pointless’ Say Experts

When Australia’s team enters the arena during the opening ceremony of the Salt Lake City Winter Olympic Games next month, the athletes will be wearing woolen overcoats made in New Zealand.

Worth more than $2000 retail, the coats were made with a blend of Australian and Kiwi lambswool by Knights of New Zealand under contract from an Australian company. It took two craftsmen to cut and sew each coat.

The coats had to be made overseas because Australia lacked the tannery facilities to make them, said Maria Italiano, Olympic project manager with Woolmark, the Australian wool industry’s marketing arm, which oversaw the production of the Australian team’s uniforms.

Kiwis were today p!ssing themselves with laughter at the way the Aussies were dipping out relentlessly in everything they tried.

It’s true that it has not been a great time to be an Aussie. First their league team got caned by the Poms (LoL) then even there rugby team was beaten, incredibly it was the Poms (LoL) that did this.

Next they lost the Davis Cup on grass at home to French (LoLer) only to see all of their hopes dashed as the sheilas got trounced in the tennis as well.

Nothing could prepare the Aussies for the worst which was watching their world champion cricket team crap out completely and lose to all comers in the One Day Series even being beaten by the Kiwi Black Craps (ROLF)

Disgusted Aussie sports fan Noby O’Jobby said from his Queensland bunker today “It’s not fair, it’s really not fair, it’s just not fair at all. First we start losing like the Kiwis and now we dress up in sheep’s clothing to attend the Olympics. The Government must intervene and make this nightmare stop.

His whinge was echoed by ockassional rugby league fan Anthony Goose “Noby’s right for once” Goose balled. ‘The Kiwis are beating us every time we play them now and to see that we have to wear sheep costumes to the Olympics is not on.’

‘Just because we Aussies are all lazy dole bludgers who qualify for every benefit in the book doesn’t mean that the Kiwis have to bail us out every single time does it?’ Goose bubbled.

But Manufacturers spokespeople today had bad news for the Aussie whingers.

‘We had to use Kiwis to do this’ said Manufacturers CEO Oswald P Wrong, ‘If we had used Aussies the price would have been double and we’d have lost most of them to employee pilfering’

Olympic Spokespeople were unavailable for comment, indicating they were sick and tied of Aussie whingers and were probably not expecting the Aussies to win much at the Olympics anyway going on their current form.

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